Negotiation 101 *warning: contains yucky stuff*

The Negotiator

My last post was full of disregard for unproven therapies.  I didn't mention that we've been following a gluten free/dairy free diet for about 3 years.  We don't buy into the theories, but Ben is definitely sensitive to something.

The past two weeks have seen multiple birthday parties, a ski trip, a cupcake making event, and two Easter egg hunts - all with treats that were off the diet.  Being too lazy a parent to provide GFCF alternatives, I told Ben's caregivers to go ahead and let him have the same treats as the other kids.  This led to some really icky results.

Potty training has actually been going very well, but we still use a "pull-up" occasionally - especially when he's been off the diet.  I'll spare you the gory details, but I was in the midst of changing one of these super-disgusting gluten/dairy-fueled poo containment units when Ben demonstrated his aptitude for negotiation.

I looked up from the train wreck in Ben's pants to see him with his finger in his mouth.

Me, panicky:               "Ben!  Are you eating something?!"
Ben, enthusiastically:  "I'm eating a booger!"
Me, authoritatively:    "Don't eat boogers!"
Ben, liltingly:             "I'm eating booooogers!"
Me, exasperated:        "DON'T EAT BOOGERS!"

This went on for a while, until Ben dropped the hammer:

Me, pleading:           "please don't eat boogers."
Ben, with finality:      "Give me candy."

Happy Easter!